I just got on Facebook...zero interest there. I saw one of my friends posted an interesting article, but I pretty much scrolled down then deactivated my account again within 2 minutes. It's just a waste of time (for me).
I finished school for the term today, so tomorrow is the first day of my summer "vacation;" i.e. working from 5:30 am until 1:30 pm without homework to come home to. I have two months to do whatever I want...before 9. What shall I do with this ample free time so that I don't waste it reading like I really want to do?
Well, a few weeks ago in my Persuasive Writing class we talked about this fireside by Elder Dallin H. Oaks and the increasing trend towards moral relativity. During that discussion, I realized that I either didn't know where I stood on a lot of issues, or else I didn't feel that I had a strong enough foundation to support my views. When I read things online, I just take it all in, accepting what sounds good, and immediately rejecting that which I disagree with. I live in my own little Mormon bubble, where I have occasionally disagreed but have generally held to the traditionalist beliefs I was raised on without question.
I don't like that.
It's not that I want to change my beliefs...obviously I think it's all true, and it isn't really my religious beliefs I'm evaluating here. I want to learn enough about the world to be able to form those arguments I learned about in my class without having to completely find out where I stand. I want to learn about myself.
And so, every week, I hope to spend some time researching and learning about various topics then writing about that experience on here. I want to develop my own ideas, similar to back when I used to write about things like education or the internet. I don't really know what topics to choose right now though...I suppose that will be part of the process each week. Any suggestions though?
Blue skies.
Wednesday, June 13, 2012
Tuesday, June 12, 2012
These Days
It's been a few weeks now.
Well, yesterday I started the first day of working at 5:30 am every day...when I went to bed last night, the light was the same as when I woke up this morning: just enough light to change the black of night to a deep, rich starless blue. I guess I never see night that way? I love the stars too much for that to last forever. Working from 5:30 to 1:30 makes for long days, but it's not actually that bad. I just keep busy, keep going, not thinking about how long I've been there. At least I get two free meals! We get to eat the leftovers after the efy kids leave, so I got both breakfast and lunch today - which was especially good because I was so exhausted from working and studying and paper writing that cooking any more was out of the question, so I ate ice cream for dinner. Dairy, right?
I'm currently "studying" for my Music 101 final...i.e., vaguely listening to music in the background while trying to remember this particular violin concerto is Brahms. We'll see how successful that is, but hey, I'm waking up in less than eight hours for another day of work, plus two finals and various other errands.
My life is pretty uneventful right now, since I pretty much just work, sleep, and read. I do occasionally hang out with people and decide that sleep just isn't worth the time it takes...then I remember how tired I am. Thus, most of my socialization happens at work, with the various people that come in for their varying shifts while I am varying degrees of exhausted.
So Winter semester my freshman year I worked for BYU Catering, making food for events at the Skyroom restaurant in the Wilk, as well as contributing to the various stores in the Cougareat. I worked 8-12 every day, and for whatever reason I had the hardest time getting up for that (I can't even imagine why now). I would spend my shift making calzones or grilling chicken or whatever, and my boss would make fun at me because I apparently always looked depressed. I probably was depressed at that point. This week I've apparently adopted that same face again, as my supervisor has mentioned it a couple times to make fun of me. Must be something about the lack of sleep...it tends to leave a frown on my face. But life is good, it's time for sleeping. The sky is almost that shade of blue again.
Blue skies!
Well, yesterday I started the first day of working at 5:30 am every day...when I went to bed last night, the light was the same as when I woke up this morning: just enough light to change the black of night to a deep, rich starless blue. I guess I never see night that way? I love the stars too much for that to last forever. Working from 5:30 to 1:30 makes for long days, but it's not actually that bad. I just keep busy, keep going, not thinking about how long I've been there. At least I get two free meals! We get to eat the leftovers after the efy kids leave, so I got both breakfast and lunch today - which was especially good because I was so exhausted from working and studying and paper writing that cooking any more was out of the question, so I ate ice cream for dinner. Dairy, right?
I'm currently "studying" for my Music 101 final...i.e., vaguely listening to music in the background while trying to remember this particular violin concerto is Brahms. We'll see how successful that is, but hey, I'm waking up in less than eight hours for another day of work, plus two finals and various other errands.
My life is pretty uneventful right now, since I pretty much just work, sleep, and read. I do occasionally hang out with people and decide that sleep just isn't worth the time it takes...then I remember how tired I am. Thus, most of my socialization happens at work, with the various people that come in for their varying shifts while I am varying degrees of exhausted.
So Winter semester my freshman year I worked for BYU Catering, making food for events at the Skyroom restaurant in the Wilk, as well as contributing to the various stores in the Cougareat. I worked 8-12 every day, and for whatever reason I had the hardest time getting up for that (I can't even imagine why now). I would spend my shift making calzones or grilling chicken or whatever, and my boss would make fun at me because I apparently always looked depressed. I probably was depressed at that point. This week I've apparently adopted that same face again, as my supervisor has mentioned it a couple times to make fun of me. Must be something about the lack of sleep...it tends to leave a frown on my face. But life is good, it's time for sleeping. The sky is almost that shade of blue again.
Blue skies!
Monday, May 28, 2012
Goodbye Forever
Yesterday morning, I deleted my Facebook.
No, that's not true; I deactivated it. But the point is the same.
I've just been reading so much for a paper I'm writing about why things like social networking and texting hold us back from forming real relationships, as well as a number of things talking about how we should get rid of the things from our lives that distract us from our purpose. A quote from a talk by Elder Dallin H. Oaks that we read in Sunday School yesterday reaffirmed my decision:
I feel so much more free! That ever-present stress of whether or not someone wrote on my wall or sent me a text is [mostly] gone. I thought my social life would suffer, but it's actually gotten better. I'm not saying that there's a correlation between the fact that I've played Settlers of Catan three of the past four days...but then again, I would say I'm more likely to go to activities and less likely to rely on old friends to keep me company. (I still love my old friends too, don't worry!)
I'm going to admit that when I saw Hunger Games the other day, I didn't like it very much. I thought Avengers was pretty good, but not as great as I might have once. I'm just not as interested in these hours of pure entertainment. I like to think! I'd rather watch Amazing Grace than Iron Man most days.
Now, I'm not saying that everyone should think the same way I do...but there is something liberating in detaching myself from all the noise of being "connected."
No, that's not true; I deactivated it. But the point is the same.
I've just been reading so much for a paper I'm writing about why things like social networking and texting hold us back from forming real relationships, as well as a number of things talking about how we should get rid of the things from our lives that distract us from our purpose. A quote from a talk by Elder Dallin H. Oaks that we read in Sunday School yesterday reaffirmed my decision:
Consider how we use our time in the choices we make in viewing television, playing video games, surfing the Internet, or reading books or magazines. Of course it is good to view wholesome entertainment or to obtain interesting information. But not everything of that sort is worth the portion of our life we give to obtain it. Some things are better, and others are best. When the Lord told us to seek learning, He said, “Seek ye out of the best books words of wisdom” (D&C 88:118; emphasis added).Along with my banishment of Facebook, I have been trying to spend as much time as possible away from my phone and other types of electronic media for at least an hour at a time these past few weeks. I try to take a walk every day, with nothing more high-tech than my keys to keep me company. I live next to a park, so I usually take advantage of its convenience and spend some time lying in the cool grass, alone with my thoughts.
I feel so much more free! That ever-present stress of whether or not someone wrote on my wall or sent me a text is [mostly] gone. I thought my social life would suffer, but it's actually gotten better. I'm not saying that there's a correlation between the fact that I've played Settlers of Catan three of the past four days...but then again, I would say I'm more likely to go to activities and less likely to rely on old friends to keep me company. (I still love my old friends too, don't worry!)
I'm going to admit that when I saw Hunger Games the other day, I didn't like it very much. I thought Avengers was pretty good, but not as great as I might have once. I'm just not as interested in these hours of pure entertainment. I like to think! I'd rather watch Amazing Grace than Iron Man most days.
Now, I'm not saying that everyone should think the same way I do...but there is something liberating in detaching myself from all the noise of being "connected."
Monday, May 21, 2012
Ode to Joy
Yeah, obviously the object of my previous post didn't ever happen.
Anyway.
Last week, I was kind of having a bit of a hard time with the tons of stress from work and school, along with the oppressive loneliness I sometimes get from living *essentially* alone. I just couldn't get past it for whatever reason, so finally I turned to the Lord. It's amazing how much that helps. At some point, a line from "Abide With Me" came to my mind:
The sky holds such freedom, and to be pointed to the sky after bursting through the gloom...the imagery is beautiful.
There are few things in this world that make me as happy as singing in choir at BYU, when all the choirs are combined during a concert and there are hundreds of gifted singers lifting their voices together in incredible power and beauty, following the hand of the director so perfectly in unison, sharing the deep emotion of the song.
One of the many experiences I look forward to the most is to be able to sing with thousands upon thousands in praise and joy, singing our best for the Lord in the choirs of Heaven. I hope I will be able to join in a choir like the Mormon Tabernacle Choir, except everyone is at their prime and is fully devoted all the time. Perhaps that sort of thing won't exist, but if there were choirs of angels proclaiming the birth of Christ, I'm sure I can spend some of eternity lifting my voice with others. What a beautiful thing that would be!
Blue skies!
Anyway.
Last week, I was kind of having a bit of a hard time with the tons of stress from work and school, along with the oppressive loneliness I sometimes get from living *essentially* alone. I just couldn't get past it for whatever reason, so finally I turned to the Lord. It's amazing how much that helps. At some point, a line from "Abide With Me" came to my mind:
Shine through the gloom, and point me to the skies!It brought such joy to me that I still can't help but smile every time I think of it. We've been singing the song in choir this term, and we had finally sung through the entire song that very day. The crescendo in the line sung by the many beautiful voices of my choir in unison is so powerful. It reminds me of when we sang "You'll Never Walk Alone" with the line:
At the end of the storm is a golden sky and the sweet silver song of the larkOr you may remember my slight obsession with the sky, and the song "High Flight" we sang in Women's Chorus a few years ago.
The sky holds such freedom, and to be pointed to the sky after bursting through the gloom...the imagery is beautiful.
There are few things in this world that make me as happy as singing in choir at BYU, when all the choirs are combined during a concert and there are hundreds of gifted singers lifting their voices together in incredible power and beauty, following the hand of the director so perfectly in unison, sharing the deep emotion of the song.
One of the many experiences I look forward to the most is to be able to sing with thousands upon thousands in praise and joy, singing our best for the Lord in the choirs of Heaven. I hope I will be able to join in a choir like the Mormon Tabernacle Choir, except everyone is at their prime and is fully devoted all the time. Perhaps that sort of thing won't exist, but if there were choirs of angels proclaiming the birth of Christ, I'm sure I can spend some of eternity lifting my voice with others. What a beautiful thing that would be!
Blue skies!
Thursday, May 10, 2012
Escapé
This seems to be becoming a tradition in my life.
Here's the thing.
I love the internet, I really do. Sort of like this...
It's kind of a love-hate relationship relationship though.
In the past, I've taken breaks from Facebook or all the internet for a week or so. But this time...I'm going all out my friends. One month.
There's no way I can avoid the internet completely, so I will go online for school or church if I have to. I'll check my email, but only from my phone or one of Harold's computers. No Facebook, blogs, Pinterest, Twitter...nothing. Hmm I suppose that means I'll have to do some creative things with my phone...it's too smart for this.
Since I can't go all the way with my internet "fast," and I really want to take away all of the technological time wasters that keep me inside, I'm going to refrain from watching TV and movies alone, and keep from mindlessly playing games on my phone. I want to get out more, even if that just means laying in the grass for an hour instead of sitting in bed staring at a screen.
My only worry with this is how it will affect my general lack of a social life at the moment...but I figure I can go about things the old fashioned way.
Lights will go out starting on Saturday morning.
If you need me, you know how to reach me.
Blue skies.
Here's the thing.
I love the internet, I really do. Sort of like this...
It's kind of a love-hate relationship relationship though.
In the past, I've taken breaks from Facebook or all the internet for a week or so. But this time...I'm going all out my friends. One month.
There's no way I can avoid the internet completely, so I will go online for school or church if I have to. I'll check my email, but only from my phone or one of Harold's computers. No Facebook, blogs, Pinterest, Twitter...nothing. Hmm I suppose that means I'll have to do some creative things with my phone...it's too smart for this.
Since I can't go all the way with my internet "fast," and I really want to take away all of the technological time wasters that keep me inside, I'm going to refrain from watching TV and movies alone, and keep from mindlessly playing games on my phone. I want to get out more, even if that just means laying in the grass for an hour instead of sitting in bed staring at a screen.
My only worry with this is how it will affect my general lack of a social life at the moment...but I figure I can go about things the old fashioned way.
Lights will go out starting on Saturday morning.
If you need me, you know how to reach me.
Blue skies.
Wednesday, April 25, 2012
Grown Up Land
At home last year, I was nannying a lot, but I still also had a lot of time to myself. Then I came back to school and was going to school full time, but again, I had a fair amount of free time.
Well.
Spring Term started yesterday. I know summer is supposed to be laid back and everything...but I've never been more busy and tired in my life (except last week during finals and when I started working). I'm working 25+ hours a week, starting at 7 am every morning, then working right up until I have class. Then class...go home...do homework...sleep. Eating sometimes happens in there somewhere. All I ever want to do these days is sleep. I moved into a new apartment, and I've taken to spending the few waking hours I have alone in my room, studying or watching a movie. I go to bed at 9:30 every night. Who does that? This girl, that's who. Having a social life might be easier if I was still living with people I'm friends with...and all my friends (and love interests haha) hadn't moved out of the ward. I feel like on the current track I'm taking (ie, being single and an antisocial hobbit), this is what the rest of my life is going to be like. I can see it now...after a long day of playing with little kids and teaching them to speak, I come home to my dogs and die randomly in my sleep...no one thinks it strange until they see the dogs with a couple of femurs and a tibia in the back yard.
I suppose this is the moment when I'm supposed to go out and be proactive...but I'm too tired.
Good night, moon.
Well.
Spring Term started yesterday. I know summer is supposed to be laid back and everything...but I've never been more busy and tired in my life (except last week during finals and when I started working). I'm working 25+ hours a week, starting at 7 am every morning, then working right up until I have class. Then class...go home...do homework...sleep. Eating sometimes happens in there somewhere. All I ever want to do these days is sleep. I moved into a new apartment, and I've taken to spending the few waking hours I have alone in my room, studying or watching a movie. I go to bed at 9:30 every night. Who does that? This girl, that's who. Having a social life might be easier if I was still living with people I'm friends with...and all my friends (and love interests haha) hadn't moved out of the ward. I feel like on the current track I'm taking (ie, being single and an antisocial hobbit), this is what the rest of my life is going to be like. I can see it now...after a long day of playing with little kids and teaching them to speak, I come home to my dogs and die randomly in my sleep...no one thinks it strange until they see the dogs with a couple of femurs and a tibia in the back yard.
I suppose this is the moment when I'm supposed to go out and be proactive...but I'm too tired.
Good night, moon.
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
Passion
I would imagine that most people in the United States generally like what they do. Of course it's not going to be great all the time, but for the most part, they like it. Sometimes, people have the opportunity to truly love their work. When these people with such great passion for their field teach, it's magical.
I just had my last Anatomy lecture. My professor this semester, Rachel Tomco, has been one of the best teachers I've had in my entire life. What makes her a great teacher isn't really her knowledge of human anatomy, or her friendliness, or the clarity of her teaching. These things certainly contribute, but there are a lot of professors at BYU that have all those traits as well. What she has brought to the class is her passion, her love, and her testimony of the divide creation of the human body. When she starts to talk about the first time she felt a lung, or just how incredible the hand is, it's infectious.
With a class that takes as much of a commitment as anatomy (4 hours of lecture and lab + open lab and study time every week), you come to either love it or hate it. Most people I've talked to tend to lean towards loving it - and I don't see how it could be any other way. With Rachel's contagious affection and the sheer beauty we saw in the cadaver lab, how can anyone resist the pull?
I believe that any class can have this effect on a [receptive] student, regardless of the subject matter, if the teacher is passionate enough. The teacher wants to share what she knows with her students because she wants to share with as many people as possible that which brings so much joy into her life. As a student, it's difficult not to get caught up in her passion, and so easy to share in it. I know when I've felt that passionate about something, it's pure joy to talk about and share. I wish all my teachers had had that same passion when I was growing up, and some of them did, but I think the added element of spirituality and testimony changes things and brings them to a higher level; It brings that passion to maturity and allows it to bloom freely. It lends it a foundation to grow and fall back on.
The combination of teaching both the spiritual and secular sides of everything is what I love most at BYU. If only every school, and aspect of life, could be this way.
"BYU seeks to develop students of faith, intellect, and character who have the skills and the desire to continue learning and to serve others throughout their lives."
I just had my last Anatomy lecture. My professor this semester, Rachel Tomco, has been one of the best teachers I've had in my entire life. What makes her a great teacher isn't really her knowledge of human anatomy, or her friendliness, or the clarity of her teaching. These things certainly contribute, but there are a lot of professors at BYU that have all those traits as well. What she has brought to the class is her passion, her love, and her testimony of the divide creation of the human body. When she starts to talk about the first time she felt a lung, or just how incredible the hand is, it's infectious.
With a class that takes as much of a commitment as anatomy (4 hours of lecture and lab + open lab and study time every week), you come to either love it or hate it. Most people I've talked to tend to lean towards loving it - and I don't see how it could be any other way. With Rachel's contagious affection and the sheer beauty we saw in the cadaver lab, how can anyone resist the pull?
I believe that any class can have this effect on a [receptive] student, regardless of the subject matter, if the teacher is passionate enough. The teacher wants to share what she knows with her students because she wants to share with as many people as possible that which brings so much joy into her life. As a student, it's difficult not to get caught up in her passion, and so easy to share in it. I know when I've felt that passionate about something, it's pure joy to talk about and share. I wish all my teachers had had that same passion when I was growing up, and some of them did, but I think the added element of spirituality and testimony changes things and brings them to a higher level; It brings that passion to maturity and allows it to bloom freely. It lends it a foundation to grow and fall back on.
The combination of teaching both the spiritual and secular sides of everything is what I love most at BYU. If only every school, and aspect of life, could be this way.
"BYU seeks to develop students of faith, intellect, and character who have the skills and the desire to continue learning and to serve others throughout their lives."
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