Deutschland

There are a lot of families in my family's ward here in Parker that have some sort of connection to Germany. Well, not a lot...but a good amount. Most of the families are connected to Germany through a mission, unsurprisingly. My family has made some strong connections with those in our ward that share our German love (also unsurprisingly...), and so we decided that we should have a German party.
It was probably one of the most random assortments of people in my ward, but we had a good time. Everyone brought some German essen, which was delicious. Our feast included: Rouladen, Spaetzle (which I made with my mad skills), Goulash, boiled potatoes, cucumber salad, and german potato salad. Not to mention dessert...basically, I forced myself to deal with my tooth pain to be able to enjoy this wonderful feast. We then spent the evening listening to stories of Germany...it made me really miss it.
Maybe I'll take off the whole year.
Maybe I'll go on a mission.
Who knows...

Music Videos

Music videos are so strange sometimes. They often have nothing to do with the lyrics of the song they're supposed to represent. Owl City and Lady Gaga have some pretty odd ones these days. I've seen some literal interpretations of some of the weirder videos, and these are my favorites. I wish the other ones that are on YouTube were as funny as these, but I guess you can't have everything.
Enjoy!

Provo

Tonight is my last night in Provo for over seven months.
And what am I doing?
Sitting on the couch, alone in my apartment, vegging.
I suppose there are a few reasons for this...a lot of my friends here are gone, and I did go and hang out with Abe and Matt yesterday. I went over and said hi to Alan today. I'd go over to apartment 31 again, but I just feel like I'm intruding. Since I'm not very good at being social. ugh. I tried though. I did.
It's been awkward since I got back...both Veronica and Quyen, my only two roommates, have boyfriends. Veronica and her Brandon are a little...creepy...in our apartment. He keeps hair gel and a toothbrush in our bathroom. Um. so. awkward. Oh, and today this girl came and looked at the apartment (I'm trying to sell my contract). She was Brazilian and didn't speak much English, so her boyfriend was there helping her.
Half my friends from high school are married now. Many in my single's ward in Parker are dating or engaged. I look on Facebook and see one of my friends telling everyone to take the Project 52: Date Nights challenge. Argh......being single sucks sometimes. I miss having single friends closer to me. It's less noticeable.

and I didn't have to worry about Brandon coming into the bathroom while I was taking a shower.

Mathematics

I love math. I'm a Math Education major, and it's wonderful. The way the numbers fit so perfectly into simple equations astounds me. The existence of numbers like Pi is to me a miracle. To me, math proves that God exists. How can such perfect numbers and ratios exist in nature otherwise? This video called Nature By Numbers shows how incredible it all is.



Nature by Numbers from Cristóbal Vila on Vimeo.

There are other things like The Hailstone Sequence that completely astound me. How can things like that always be true?
Math is perfection. Isn't it beautiful?


Mandelbrot Fractal Set Trip To e214 HD from teamfresh on Vimeo.

I must admit, the view from where I sit has been rather grey.

I had this dream last night of someone I miss dearly...It was the best experience I've had since I left Utah. Why did I get out of bed? The two of us were so happy together, which is something that never actually happened in reality. My imagination is the only place I can be with him. He's just so perfect for me, but apparently I'm not what he's looking for.
Oh well.
I'm watching Pride & Prejudice for the millionth time. It gives me both hope and despair, however odd it seems. I love it though...even if it is the shorter version. It's far more romantic that the long one, which is something I need right now. What a beautiful era...we've lost a lot of beauty and honor with the feminist movement. I dislike this. I'm not a romantic in the usual way, but I adore romance when it is more...personalized? Clever? Well, for example, in the movie Stranger Than Fiction the main character gives the woman he likes, who is a baker, flours. Isn't that sweet? It made me cry.
If I can't have someone else, I've decided just to become the best me and if no one likes me then, then obviously the world has no taste.

Free

I have to say...Colorado really does have the prettiest sky-scapes. I love the sky.

Purpose

I read a book today called A Million Miles in a Thousand Years: What I learned While Editing My Life. It was about creating stories and memories. I've come to realize that I don't remember much about my life. I never did anything of note...I have no reason to really have memories. The author, Dan, realized that he had the same problem, and so he decided to create memories, to create stories. I want to do that. I want to do something with my life. The thing is, he has something that I don't: money. There are things I can do without money, but not much. I can't get anywhere. I wish I could be a child again, and find adventures in my own backyard. 
I need to get away. I need to escape for a few days. This is something I'd want to do with a good friend or a significant other, but my friends are far away and the second... I can't though. I want to go to the Pacific Northwest, to the beach. I want to go to New England and see America's history. Those are the only two places I can go in the United States to get away from my life...a downfall of having lived everywhere. I just want a vacation from life. 
The other day I found a list of tips for life on stumbleupon. One particularly struck me:

Envision your ultimate life. What would your ultimate life be like? Where would you live, what would you do, what would you do with your days? Come up with a clear picture of this, and write it down. Now, one step at a time, make it come true.

 I want to do this. There have been so many distractions lately though...I really need to get away from everything to do it. I need a goal in life. I got lost somewhere along the way, and now I'm looking to get back. But to where? That is the question.

Personal Freedoms

Five high schoolers were sent home because they were wearing American Flag shirts on Cinco de Mayo. There were apparently Mexican-American students that were offended by this, saying that they wouldn't wear Mexican flag shirts on the Fourth of July. This makes me angry. Incredibly angry. Well, um, we're in the United States. We're American. We don't celebrate Cinco de Mayo here. It's like saying that Mexicans in Mexico aren't allowed to wear Mexican flag shirts on the Fourth of July. They don't celebrate, or even care about American Independence Day there, and we don't care if they care. It has nothing to do with them, just as Cinco de Mayo has nothing to do with us. We don't celebrate other countries' holidays here. We celebrate American holidays. The students that were offended have no right to demand that we comply with their country's holiday. THIS ISN'T MEXICO. They can celebrate their holiday, but it isn't something we have to care about. I do respect the holiday though, personally. I respect other people's holidays, however, this isn't something that the government should force on people. It's like the whole politically correct crap all over again. We should be a nation of tolerance, but we can't take it too far. We are granted the freedom of speech in the Constitution, which includes the right to not care about other country's holidays. 

I should start complaining about people not recognizing Pioneer Day. That's an American holiday.

Today

Got rejected for another job today.
But I did just learn an awesome card trick from StumbleUpon.
Win lose.

Family Wards

The Auburn Hills Ward is a completely different beast than my singles ward...church is a completely different experience.
There are around 250 kids in the primary, and so sacrament meeting is never even close to quiet. Luckily my family always sits in front...I can't even imagine what the noise is like in the back. It takes twelve deacons to pass the Sacrament. There were a lot of people gone today (we only took up half the gym past the overflow), so it only took about twenty minutes. If everyone's there...my sister says that they regularly have eighteen deacons passing. Gospel Doctrine was pretty empty for a ward this size, since everyone has a calling in Primary. My parents are among the oldest ten couples in the ward-they're 44. There were five or six babies born in the past month, and there was a baby blessing today...they're trying to spread them out. There was also a double baptism yesterday, and there was a new family read into the ward today. Every time I go home I recognize less and less people, since there's usually at least one new family each week and I haven't been home in four months. The thing is, they can't split the ward since most of the ward is under the age of ten. Did I mention we have three nurseries? My ward is like a teenage boy that just hit his growth spurt...except that this growth spurt has lasted since before my family moved in. The Auburn Hills Ward was created two years before my family moved in, and we've been here for three years now. We're considered an older family.
My ward is like going to a different church after my BYU ward. Weird.

Home

"Where are you from?"

This is a simple question, easily answered by most. It would never be considered a difficult question by, oh, 99% of the world.

I hate this question. I fall into that less than 1% of the world that doesn't have a hometown. I never know what to say. There are multiple ways I can answer...my favorite is simply "heaven." I usually say something along the lines of "everywhere," but that gets people asking questions. 

I'm sort of from Denver...this is where my family lives, but I only lived here for a year before I left. I don't have friends here, and even though I know Parker like the back of my hand, I really don't feel at home here. Driving around Parker today made me realize how much of a visitor I really am in my family's town. I know Mission Viejo just as well, and that feels more like home to me. And so...I can't say I'm from Parker. 

Sometimes people say that I'm from where I lived the longest. Well...I lived in Utah until I was six. That's the longest by far...somehow I don't think that counts. I'm also not that keen on the idea of telling people I'm from Provo.

Others say that I should claim my favorite place of residence as home - Germany was definitely my favorite, but I was only there for two years in middle school. I don't think I can really claim somewhere I haven't been in six years as home.

So where am I from? Nowhere. If I stay in Provo long enough, maybe I'll start claiming that as home eventually. Except...I'm not from Provo. I'm not from Colorado. I'm not from Georgia. I'm not from Germany. I'm not from Las Vegas. I'm not from Texas. I'm not from Carson City. 

Home is where the heart is...so your real home's in your chest. :)